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Untold millions of foolish non-believers have rejected their Savior and the Word of God.  The Lucifer Parody Letters are a serious yet mocking reflection on how the satanic gates to Hell have been flung open.

Parody Letters From Lucifer Series

Letter #3


APRIL 1, 2006

By…Michael Westfall



The Lucifer Parody Letters Introduction

GET THIS AND GET IT CLEAR! My devil's blueprint manipulates all willing groups that impact American culture. These groups include law, entertainment as well as various cultural and special interest organizations. My agenda creates an apocalyptic chain of events designed to deliver America to my altar.

I just don’t think Americans get it as they refute my existence. I delight in blind-siding gullible Americans who are surrounded daily by my active disciples and evidence of my work, yet refuse to believe in hell. I expose only a glimpse of my blueprint in each communication. Collectively those who receive one of my letters will have the ability to put the pieces of my agenda together, like the pieces of a puzzle and garner a glimpse of the pathway to Hell itself…





Dear American Organized Labor Officials,


I am  Lucifer” but you may call me Satan”.  My spirit is alive and active through my disciples in the United States of America as well as the rest of the world. This is my third letter of personal communication to my most influential supporters who have become a major force in changing American culture.


To each of America’s top organized labor officials who have voluntarily taken it upon yourselves to promote important elements of my liberal agenda, I know who you are and this letter of appreciation and instruction is exclusively for you personally”.

I realize that you acquired your collective power and influence, because of your union predecessors whose exclusive priority was to represent and protect their members and retirees.

I understand that there have been few forces on earth that have done as much for working people or helped more to create America,s middle class then your union predecessors. Through union strength, America’s nastiest sweatshops were all but eliminated. Labor's past leaders garnered a measure of respect as well as decent pay, good benefits, job security and a livable retirement after decades of hard work for workers. These gains lasted until your tenure.


Today, I have you sidetracked on issues important to me and you have already aggressively promoted various elements of my liberal anti-Biblical agenda…. You are doing very well indeed! Thank you, Thank you!


I am elated by how you use union resources to advance my issues like abortion or the destruction of the American family through your successful support for the homosexual agenda and same sex marriage. You should be tending to the business of saving jobs and protecting your retirees, but instead you allow me to shamefully use you in spite of your Judeo-Christian workforce!


In 2005, Top officials in the AFL-CIO Executive Council passed an important resolution favoring the legitimization of homosexual relations. It calls for supporting the “full inclusion of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people into the workplace and society.”


It gives me the shivering fits the way your resolution stated that a proposed amendment to the Federal constitution to define marriage as the union of one man and one woman “threatens the rights of domestic partners.” 


It is part of my devil's brew how you take a portion of your Christian members hard-earned money to advance a political agenda that undermines their own families, and is diametrically opposite to workers deeply held religious and moral convictions.

We must continue constricting the rights of non-conforming Christian members as we spit out barbs calling them homophobic and unpatriotic. If they want to be Christians, make them pay a steep cost for their beliefs! It is Biblical you know!


Your beast salutes you! These issues clearly allow me to force all workers to choose between their union and God.


We had a recent success when homosexual autoworkers pressured you sympathetic UAW officials to quietly slip their gay and lesbian same-sex partners into the autoworkers contract in order to ascertain lucrative spousal benefits.


Mercy, how can I disagree with this? You slice these needed benefits from your powerless God fearing struggling retirees who worked all of their lives to earn them, and “gift” these benefits to practicing same-sex homosexual free loaders who have nothing to do with the workplace! Such tremendously convoluted use of union power! What other such expensive activities can we pursue to advance my agenda? Your active members who are losing their jobs and benefits will be forced to pay…what else can they do with such terrific leaders such as yourselves at the helm?


I know first-hand that since Adam and Eve every nation and every religious faith has supported the one-man one-woman marriage, which has advanced society and given a balanced home life to children as well as stability to civilizations.


Just take it from me, the lying, confusing and delusional sidewinder from the Garden of Eden, if I can destroy America’s marriage and definition of family, this alone will destroy America’s culture. This will betray America’s children who must live in America after their parents are gone. As the beast, I don’t really care if your kids ever forgive you for squandering this opportunity to protect marriage for them and their future families.


Thank you, Again and Again! I will see to it personally that you will have “the time of your life when my destiny for your life is…OVER”.


If you reject Jesus and fall through my trap door, your existence will no longer be yours. You did know my trapdoor gatemen were ACLU attorneys who have already crossed over didn’t you? There is no trapdoor going out…just in! This is the only place these attorneys have not been able to talk themselves out of…nor will they!


Listen! I admit it is crowded down here, but Big Red will make room just for you! Just remember that the “saved” are not welcome here.


In the 2003 national auto contract, UAW workers were stunned as you UAW officials demanded automakers, in secret talks, cover abortions in benefit packages. Christian workers were enraged. You were startled to see your rank & file workers wing into action circulating petitions totally opposed to the abortion-killing machine. I was surprised too, because I thought we had won them over on abortion!


My supportive democrats confound even me on this abortion issue. Forty years ago the Democrats, under the leadership of Presidents like Lyndon Johnson and his Great Society Program, were actually paying unwed women to have children through their “Democratic welfare programs”. The more babies they had…the more money they got.

Today, some of my confused ultra liberal Democrats are pushing for the murder through abortion of the descendents of the folks born from their very own Great Society years… Even though I am the master of confusion, these politicians “about-face” still has me mystified! 


It certainly gives me, your angry beast, a strange glow the way you union officials warm up to my disciples on the ultra liberal side of the Democratic Party!


I find it interesting that when you focus on America’s employment dilemma, rather then look inwardly at union leadership failures, corporate leadership failures or labor’s Democratic friends’ failures, you exclusively demonize and point your accusatory finger at the Republicans.

Mercy! We both know that this is ridiculously myopic! 

Rather then call our Democratic comrades to task on the moral issues, you join them, caucus with them and use your powers to make my agenda a reality in the workplace.

Oh yes, I don’t want to forget to thank you for using your union magazines for personal political propaganda. It plainly is brilliant. These magazines should be filled exclusively with ways in which you are helping your memberships. The political way in which you use these union magazines, however, to target and call Republicans names is amusing to me.

I expect you to be aware, because the rank and file, who you refuse to caucus on these moral issues, believe that there are those in the Democratic party who are really as crooked as a dog's hind leg because of their stand against Biblical based morality in America today. That is why workers continue to vote Republican. The Republicans know this and take full advantage of it!

Historically, your union official support has always been with our Democratic buddies. Has it helped your members? Are workers better off or worse off today because of your past support of the Democrats? Have workers lost hundreds of thousands of jobs? Have workers benefits improved with your connection with the Democrats or have their benefits been sliced and their retirements threatened? Are more concessions on the way? Are millions of American workers facing a disaster not of their own making where they have dedicated their entire lives building these industries, and they now view old age and retirement not as a blessing but rather a time of severe hardship? 

Oh, one last thing, I do appreciate how most of you union officials refuse to use your members' huge retirement funds against me like those nasty Texas teachers, who recently withdrew their multi billion dollar Texas teachers' retirement funds from investments in businesses such as films rated x or NC-17, strip clubs or pornography. What a revolting development that is! This kind of stratagem doesn’t help me much!

While Christian conservatives may call your pursuit of my liberal blueprint as pathetic, “I call it warfare”. I don’t care about making my agenda right, I only want it politically correct and “legal”!

This may sound like the haughty blustery rhetoric of the king of liars, but I do declare that this powerful pattern setting trend of anti-Biblical, anti-family, anti-retiree and anti-worker benefits that you are negotiating makes perfect sense to me.


Honestly speaking, if you say that my agenda won’t work in the good old U.S.A.... Mercy! You are so…wrong! I can remember when the Romans said that about their beloved Rome! I intend for America’s culture to implode like none other in recorded history. Your kids will see it…and so may you.


Come on! If America finally loses this moral war, then what does it matter how many nuclear bombs or space-age warfare technologies you have? If you lose your families, what is worth protecting? It almost makes my large red eyes tear up…but not quite!


HEY! I am not here to teach the truth! When America totally repudiates God's Word and the Bible's absolute truth then America will take away all meaning to their existence!  Didn’t you know that? The only power left will be …ME! “Come on! ”…Do you really believe that I want that fact out?


In conclusion, continue using your powers to manipulate the minds and hearts of workers to believe that the standards of morality based on the Ten Commandments are no longer relative, and the Biblical absolutes have no meaning. Continue identifying Christian workers, who disagree with your positions, as right wing workers who are sowing dissention within the union!


Demand workers be tolerant and non-judgmental, and that they accept as equals the values, beliefs and lifestyles of anyone, even if their Bibles call these other lifestyles as detestable or an abomination like it does homosexuality.Continue to ignore the fact that abortion is America’s terrible ongoing holocaust and that all life belongs to God including the unborn.


Do not stop demonizing Christian conservatives, regardless of their political party, or transforming the very fabric of American society. Continue taking the wrong side of the moral table by accommodating my pathetic, tragic, and dark agenda.


You really make my tail tingle, and my “just rewards” for you will be “just amazing” when you cross over to me… after we burn your bridge behind you! 

By the way, I would never want to alarm you…but… you may not be real fired up with enthusiasm when you finally cross over here and realize where you really are.

Don’t begin sniveling…yet! If you have rejected God's love, you are already booked on the misery cruise headed down the lake of fire. Your destination is your own ROAST and TOAST. Sounds like Hell, doesn't it? Don’t be so diffident… it is your “Just Reward”!

Just remember that this is not the inferno of the free and organized down here.There will be no union representatives, no strikes, no reconciliation and no caucusing here. There will be no wage improvements, worker dignity, paid holidays or health care benefits although health insurance could be of use here.


I do, however, guarantee you much company with many of your old political cronies, never-ending job security and more fireworks then you ever saw on any of your forth of July union picnics.  No, there will be no hot dogs, bean soup, lollipops or, although you would sell your soul for the second time for just a drop of water. You will forever remember when people offered the Word of God to you and curse the day you laughed at them.


I am the beast of deception, mystification and doubletalk. I am out to exploit your families, destroy your culture, abandon your values, devastate your morality, kill your unborn, turn your children into practicing homosexuals and put America on its knees at my altar. I am lining you and those you love up for my cruise to the eternal fire of damnation. You have never seen or tasted the kind of revulsion I have for mankind… I AM SATAN!


Your American dream is almost over; get ready for my nightmare…YOUR CRUISE IS GETTING CLOSER!


Your Master, 

Satan, the anti-Christ

(Lucifer the Beast)





Westfall’s “The American Worker”


Beware of the next Lucifer Parody Letter to my next “close” disciple. It is coming forthright!


See ... Steps to Becoming a Christian By Rev. Kirby See

 Lucifer Parody Letter #1 to the… “ACLU”. See

Lucifer Parody Letter #2 to the The American Music Industry” See


The American Conservative Worker